Love, Commitment, and Marriage

You grow up knowing that things in life don't come easily, not even marriage.

My parents were pretty real with my siblings and I.

I saw them get mad at each other and make up. I saw the days where they barely spoke to each other, and the days where they couldn't seem to stop touching.

I knew when going into marriage that there would be good and bad days.

When Wade and I first got married, it was easy.
We compromised pretty smoothly.
We worked well together and got along living with each other without too much fuss.

However, I knew when we reached that point where the "honey-moon" was beginning to fade.

I'm pretty sure he felt it too...

 

Not that I'm still not completely in love with my husband.

Not that I don't still want to spend time with him and hold his hand.

Not that don't still want to fall asleep next to him at night.

Everything just isn't as easy and fuss-free as it used to be. 

 

I won't lie and say the last couple of months have been easy.

To be honest, there were days that we went to sleep mad at each other.

There were days where it felt like all we done was argue.

And there were days I would cry myself quietly to sleep, wondering why we'd even argued.

 

Again, you grow up knowing these things happen.

But hearing about it or seeing it from another couples isn't quite the same as facing it yourself.

 

Through all that my husband and I have been through the past few months, I've learned something....

 

.....That I'm even more in love with him now than when I said I do......

 

How is that possible, you ask?

 

Because the last year and five months....

I've went to bed and woke up beside him.

We've laughed together and cried together.

We've struggled with finances and snuggled up on the couch with a movie we have watched a gazillion times because we didn't have any money to go out.

We've gotten mad at each other and made up.

We've made some tough decisions and got through them together.

We've both worried and wondered and prayed.

He's been my shoulder to cry on, and he's held me after fights.

He's made me smile, even on those days I find it the hardest.

He's worked his tail off to make sure our bills, gas, food, etc. is covered.

 

Marriage isn't supposed to be easy all of the time, if that was the case the divorce ratio would be a lot better.

When you make a commitment to someone, it shouldn't be just in the good times or when that person is at their best.

Commitment means sticking it out when everything seems its darkest.

It means arguing and being a big enough person to eventually just let it go.

It means accepting that neither of you are perfect.

It means facing the storms side by side and coming out on the other side together.

Last night my husband and I got to talking about some of the things we'd heard from other couples, the things on the Internet (like the website made specifically for spouses who want to find someone to cheat with...), and just the world we live in, in general.

I honestly teared up thinking about it.

We live in a world where the value of marriage has dropped significantly.
If you don't like it, hey you can divorce that one and get another one.

We live in a world where adultery is common and almost a "no big" now days.

We live in a world where commercials should now be rated R...

To me...this is not okay .
And I hope I raise my kid to realize that this stuff isn't okay .
It may be generally accepted now days,
but it is not accepted or  okay for this family.

I'm thankful for my husband and for the Godly convictions that he has all on his own.
I'm thankful that he is someone I can trust.
I'm thankful that in the morning I walk into the kitchen and find his Bible open where he was reading it before he left for work.

This is going to sound old school, and that is okay as well, because I truly feel that is important.

Wives... if you love your husband, pray for him.
Pray for him on his job, pray for his day, pray that the Lord's protection always be with him.
Pray for your marriage, because it isn't always easy, and the "feeling" may not always be there.
However, whether or not you are feeling the love for your spouse at a specific moment, the commitment should always be present, and that makes the love last.

It was easy to love in the beginning, because it was all new.
You loved doing things for one another and loved spending time together.
You loved holding hands and touching.
Never forget why you loved doing those things...
Nearly two years later and I still will fix my husband's plate and have a glass of tea ready for him when he comes home...not because I'm just a homey, good little house wife, but because I love him,
and I just want to make a little piece of his day easier.
Nearly two years later and he still holds me in the bed at night just the way I like it (with both arms wrapped around me), not because I ask him, but just because he knows I like it.

We have had our rough days.
And even after those rough days, I know that I would still walk back down that aisle to him and say I do all over again.
I loved him before that moment, but when I made that commitment, it became something more than just a feeling, and something that would make that feeling last even on those days I'm not quite feeling it.

I love you, husband.
Thank you for all of your sacrifices,
for working so hard,
for putting up with my bad days,
and laughing with me on the good ones,
for cleaning the toilet (you know i hate it),
and helping put up the clothes,
for letting me throw my leg (or but) on you during the night,
for....everything.

I couldn't have asked for anyone more imperfectly perfect for me.

“As long as you remember the person who loved you, and whom you still love, then you're making love endure.” 
-Guillaume Musso